How to Husk a Coconut

That beautiful tree at left graced our driveway until the landlord realized it posed a liability problem. Coconuts bouncing down our long, steep hill could cause major damage by the time they crossed the street below at a hundred miles an hour. Rather than just pick the coconuts before they fell, his solution was to cut whole tree down. A bit like cutting your head off to avoid haircuts, if you ask me. On the bright side, we found ourselves in possession of three dozen young coconuts.

First, a quick coconut anatomy lesson. They are protected by two outer layers, a fibrous yellow-green husk around a hard brown shell. Inside the hard shell is a third layer, the meat, and then a central cavity containing watery coconut milk. The "milk" at this point is not nearly as thick or rich as the canned stuff; that takes a few additional steps after extraction. A Hawaiian riddle describes the coconut layers, ʻEkolu pā a loaʻa ka wai. He aha la ia? "Three walls to get to the water, what am I?" The answer of course is ka niu.

The younger a coconut is, the softer the meat will be, the more milky liquid it will have and the better it will be for drinking. As the coconut ages, the milk is absorbed, the meat firms and it grates more easily. Our batch was right in the middle, with plenty of milk and good flesh.

If the coconuts you buy at the supermarket are brown and hard with bits of fibrous hair, then the outer husk has already been removed. Let's assume for now that it hasn't and you're trying to figure out how to get this puppy open. These football-sized nuts are tough, able to bang around on ocean currents for thousands of miles before washing up on distant sandy shores to sprout. With proper technique though, they can be opened in just a few minutes.

Method One: A Sharp, Pointy Stick
The traditional Samoan method for husking secures a strong stick in the ground, pointy end up. They jam the coconut onto the spike and work it around until the husk falls away, then poke the stick into one of the eyes to drain the liquid. Sharp objects and I don't do well together, so this method would be a recipe for disaster. The only thing I can imagine piercing is my hand.

Method Two: A Sharp, Pointy Machete
The guys at the swap meet whittle away one end of the coconut with a machete until they can lop off the end and stick a straw in the top. Three bucks gets you one, ice cold. This method sounds promising, but again we have the sharp object problem. Whacking a hard, round object with a big knife takes practice. Besides, my machete is duller than a butter knife.

Method Three: The Best (Especially for People Who Hurt Themselves on Sharp, Pointy Things)
My preferred method for husking a coconut is far more primitive yet equally effective.

Grab a young coconut in two hands, stem end facing down. Think of something you're really pissed at, then lift the coconut to shoulder height and smack it down onto the driveway. Watch out because the nut can bounce unpredictably and leave a nasty bruise. Pick the nut up, turn it around 180 degrees so that the point is facing down this time. Embrace your inner rage and hurl it at the ground. Didn't that feel good? Repeat this process, smacking alternating ends of the coconut on the ground until the outer husk splits in several spots. Grab wedges of the outer husk and peel them away.

Now you should have a brown, hard-shelled coconut. We can do this the neat way, or the fun way. The neat way is to take a hacksaw and slice the coconut in half. Remembering my penchant for injuring myself with sharp implements, I wore heavy leather gloves while I sawed a few. It takes a while, so be patient. The only reason you'd want to hacksaw your fruit is to get two nice coconut shell bowls. (Dry them in the sun then sand them down.)

If you couldn't care less about pretty coconut bowls and just want the treasure inside, we can use the fun way: more banging. Whack the coconut against the ground again, just hard enough to crack it. Have a mixing bowl nearby and drain all the milk into it. You should then be able to work your fingers into the crack and pry the shell open. Congratulations, you're all done except for cleanup.

...now what? The milk can be strained, chilled and sipped, on it's own or mixed with other juices or rum. Scrape the meat out with a sturdy spoon and use it in recipes that call for grated coconut, or just break off chunks and chew on them. In the next few days I'll provide a recipe for thickening your own coconut milk suitable for cooking. The variations are endless.

It kinda doesn't matter what you do next. This is one of those times where the journey can be more fun than the destination... you just husked a coconut!